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David French Praises Satan As 'Most Christian Person In History' - Article image
Christian Living · Mar 9, 2026 · 16
David French Praises Satan As 'Most Christian Person In History'

CHICAGO, IL - Political commentator and columnist for The New York Times David French praised Satan on Monday, calling the great red dragon the most C...

Mamdani Clarifies That His Wife Only Celebrates Terrorism In Her Capacity As A Private Citizen - Article image
U.S. · Mar 9, 2026 · 24
Mamdani Clarifies That His Wife Only Celebrates Terrorism In Her Capacity As A Private Citizen

NEW YORK, NY - Mayor Zohram Mandani called a press conference on Monday to clarify that his wife only celebrates the actions and mission of terrorists...

Obama Library To Feature Interactive Exhibit Where Visitors Can Print Their Own Birth Certificates - Article image
U.S. · Mar 9, 2026 · 35
Obama Library To Feature Interactive Exhibit Where Visitors Can Print Their Own Birth Certificates

CHICAGO, IL - According to early reviews, the new Obama Presidential Center boasts an exciting interactive exhibit for all ages where guests can make ...
Iran Boasts It Has Destroyed Hundreds Of US Missiles With Its Buildings
Iran Boasts It Has Destroyed Hundreds Of US Missiles With Its Buildings
Iran Boasts It Has Destroyed Hundreds Of US Missiles With Its Buildings - Featured article image
World · Mar 9, 2026 · 44

TEHRAN - As the conflict in the Middle East stretched into a second week, the Iranian government issued a public statement boasting that it had destro...

Europe Under Persistent Delusion Anyone Cares What It Thinks - Article image
World · Mar 9, 2026 · 20
Europe Under Persistent Delusion Anyone Cares What It Thinks

BRUSSELS - As all eyes around the globe remained fixed on the ongoing U.S.-Iran conflict, leaders gathered for an important summit in a clear display ...

World · Mar 9, 2026 · 20
Europe Under Persistent Delusion Anyone Cares What It Thinks

Europe Under Persistent Delusion Anyone Cares What It Thinks - Featured article image
BRUSSELS - As all eyes around the globe remained fixed on the ongoing U.S.-Iran conflict, leaders gathered for an important summit in a clear display ...
Obama Library To Feature Interactive Exhibit Where Visitors Can Print Their Own Birth Certificates - Article image
U.S. · Mar 9, 2026 · 35
Obama Library To Feature Interactive Exhibit Where Visitors Can Print Their Own Birth Certificates

CHICAGO, IL - According to early reviews, the new Obama Presidential Center boasts an exciting interactive exhibit for all ages where guests can make ...

Subscriber Headlines

In Honor Of Women's History Month, Nation's Thermostats Set To 80 Degrees

Mar 5, 2026 | LPA The Human


Final Requirement To Become Navy SEAL Revealed To Be Brushing A Toddler's Teeth

Feb 26, 2026 | Unlocked Milk


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U.S. Embassy In Minneapolis Evacuated Over Safety Concerns For American Citizens - Article image
U.S. Embassy In Minneapolis Evacuated Over Safety Concerns For American Citizens
U.S. · Mar 6, 2026 · 71
DHS Nominee Markwayne Mullin Surges In Popularity After Vowing To Deport Liberal White Ladies - Article image
DHS Nominee Markwayne Mullin Surges In Popularity After Vowing To Deport Liberal White Ladies
Politics · Mar 6, 2026 · 97
Tearful Trump Takes Kristi Noem Behind Woodshed - Article image
Tearful Trump Takes Kristi Noem Behind Woodshed
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8 New Jobs Dan Crenshaw Has His Eye On - Article image
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U.S. Air Force Destroys $3,200 Iranian Regime Toyota With $30-Million Smart Bomb - Article image
U.S. Air Force Destroys $3,200 Iranian Regime Toyota With $30-Million Smart Bomb
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Mamdani Condemns New Yorkers For Making Muslims Throw Bombs At Them - Article image
Politics · Mar 8, 2026 · 85
Mamdani Condemns New Yorkers For Making Muslims Throw Bombs At Them

NEW YORK CITY - Mayor Zohran Mamdani has strongly condemned New Yorkers for making Muslims throw improvised explosive devices at them.
Megyn Kelly Goes Back To Normal After Eating A Snickers - Article image
Media · Mar 6, 2026 · 81
Megyn Kelly Goes Back To Normal After Eating A Snickers

NEW YORK, NY - After months of mounting concern over her apparent change in viewpoints on geopolitical matters, popular commentator and podcaster Megy...
Pope Condemns Allied Forces For Not Just Talking It Out With Nazis - Article image
Christian Living · Mar 8, 2026 · 94
Pope Condemns Allied Forces For Not Just Talking It Out With Nazis

VATICAN CITY - Pope Leo issued a forceful condemnation of the Allied Forces resorting to violence instead of simply talking things out with the Nazis.
Newly-Unemployed Dan Crenshaw Joins Crew Of 'Pirates Who Don't Do Anything' - Article image
Politics · Mar 8, 2026 · 65
Newly-Unemployed Dan Crenshaw Joins Crew Of 'Pirates Who Don't Do Anything'

HOUSTON, TX - Out of a job after his primary defeat, Dan Crenshaw has officially joined up with the crew of the infamous "Pirates Who Don't Do Anythin...

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7 Tips For Christian Women To Dress Modestly - Article image
Christian Living · Mar 4, 2026 · 123
7 Tips For Christian Women To Dress Modestly

It can be difficult to find modest attire when you're a Christian woman, what with all the competing expectations. Fortunately, we at the Babylon Bee ...
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child - Article image
Sponsored · Dec 15, 2021 · 174
10 Christmas Gift Ideas For Your Leftist Child

First off, congratulations on raising a child already versed in progressive ideals! Your Christmas holiday is sure to be filled with joy, laughter, fe...
American Values Under Attack: County Replaces 4-Way Stop With Roundabout - Article image
U.S. · Mar 5, 2026 · 131
American Values Under Attack: County Replaces 4-Way Stop With Roundabout

BATESVILLE, IN - In what many called a brazen attack on cherished American values, the Ripley County Board of Commissioners announced that it had elec...
Iranian Regime Calls White House To Ask If They Can Have Biden Back - Article image
World · Mar 5, 2026 · 79
Iranian Regime Calls White House To Ask If They Can Have Biden Back

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Faced with the threat of their total annihilation, the Islamic Republic of Iran reportedly contacted the White House on Thursday to...

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All Other MLB Teams Forced To Forfeit As Dodgers Sign Every Baseball Player In Existence - Article image
Sports · Nov 29, 2024 · 60
All Other MLB Teams Forced To Forfeit As Dodgers Sign Every Baseball Player In Existence

LOS ANGELES, CA - It's official, the 2025 Major League Baseball season is over and the Los Angeles Dodgers have been preemptively declared World Serie...
Furious Gavin Newsom Bans A.I. Images After Getting Tricked Into Thinking Pic Of Trump As A Mer-Man Was Real - Article image
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8 Other Uses For Your Bible Since We Know You're Not Reading It, You Sinner - Article image
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Liberals Raise Concerns About Account That's Making Them Look Bad By Just Sharing Their Actual Words - Article image
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Vance Dons Helmet And Body Armor In Preparation To Run With Trump - Article image
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Problems In Middle East Blamed On The 0.3% Of It That Isn’t An Islamic Dictatorship - Article image
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'Abortion Is Healthcare,' Says Woman Who Apparently Thinks 'Healthcare' Means Tearing A Human Being Limb From Limb - Article image
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New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader - Article image
Premium · Mar 5, 2026 · 48
New Video - BREAKING: Iran Announces Their New Supreme Leader

The Iranian government has officially announced a successor to Ayatollah Khamenei, introducing today the new Supreme Leader - wait, they have now anno...
New Video - The Buzz #40: War! - Article image
Premium · Mar 5, 2026 · 21
New Video - The Buzz #40: War!

War! The Republic is crumbling under attacks by the ruthless Sith Lord, Count Dooku. There are heroes on both sides. Evil is everywhere. Wait, wait! T...
New Video - Gavin Newsom Appeals To Voters - Article image
Premium · Mar 3, 2026 · 33
New Video - Gavin Newsom Appeals To Voters

California Governor Gavin Newsom is just like you. He's a 960 SAT guy, and he can't read. Just like your mom. In his latest speech, he outlines severa...
Ten Years On: The Satire Site That Changed The World - Article image
Premium · Mar 3, 2026 · 89
Ten Years On: The Satire Site That Changed The World

Ten years ago, Adam Ford launched The Babylon Bee and little did he know that it would go on to change the world. Little is known about Adam Ford. Who...

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In Genius Move, Trump Supports Impeachment, Forcing Democrats To Oppose - Article image
In Genius Move, Trump Supports Impeachment, Forcing Democrats To Oppose
Politics · Nov 18, 2019 · 8
Judge Dismisses Sexual Assault Allegations Against Biden On Grounds That He Is Not A Republican - Article image
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Powerful: Protesters Spell Out 'Love' With Burning Homes And Businesses - Article image
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Californians Brace For Deadly 50-Degree Cold Front - Article image
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Health · Jan 31, 2019 · 45
Cracker Jack Changes Name To More Politically Correct Caucasian Jack - Article image
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Trump Cancels 2020 Election Over Coronavirus Concerns - Article image
Trump Cancels 2020 Election Over Coronavirus Concerns
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