The Babylon Bee
Crime
· Oct 6, 2026
· 78
Trump Approves Fort Hood Shooter Being Tied To A Bomb And Dropped On Iran
WASHINGTON, D.C. - President Donald Trump approved the execution of Nidal Malik Hasand on Monday, confirming that he would be tied to a bomb and dropp...
Sports
· Oct 6, 2026
· 52
Jameis Winston Diagnosed With Concussion After Giving Coherent Response
EAST RUTHERFORD, NJ - New York Giants quarterback Jameis Winston was placed in the NFL's concussion protocol by team trainers after he gave a coherent...
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U.S.
· Oct 5, 2026
· 150
Top 10 Reasons To Move To Indiana
Looking to move to a new state? Look no further than Indiana! There are plenty of reasons to move there. Seriously.
U.S.
· Oct 5, 2026
· 61
Prison Officials Unsure How To Execute Woman On Ventilator That Is Plugged Into The Wall
NASHVILLE, TN - Prison officials admitted they were unsure how to go about executing a woman who was currently being kept alive by a ventilator that i...
Media
· Oct 5, 2026
· 70
Young, Attractive Blonde Woman Somehow Manages To Land Job At Fox News
NEW YORK, NY - Against all odds, a young, attractive blonde woman managed to land a job working at Fox News.
Politics
· Oct 5, 2026
· 51
Democrats Blame Cuts In USAID For Slowing Communist Takeover Of The West
U.S. - With unrest drawing attention around the globe and the November midterm elections coming up soon, Democrats made it a point to blame President ...
Must Read
U.S.
· Oct 3, 2026
· 91
Avoid Getting Charged With Rape At A Ketamine-Fueled Orgy With This One Simple Trick
While the facts are still coming out in the Cornell case, some of the allegations appear to be a total reversal of the accuser's story from two years ...
Crime
· Oct 2, 2026
· 112
10 Surefire Ways To Execute Criminals
While humanity was once pretty effective at executing criminals, we've stumbled a bit as of late.
U.S.
· Oct 2, 2026
· 66
Letitia James Indicts Trump In Cornell Case
ITHACA, NY - Immediately following her appointment as a special prosecutor to investigate the alleged sexual assault of a female student, New York Att...
Tech
· Oct 3, 2026
· 51
Apple Fires Engineer For Designing Phone Battery That Lasts Longer Than Two Hours
CUPERTINO, CA - Apple confirmed it has fired senior battery engineer Daniel Li after he developed a prototype iPhone battery that lasted more than two...
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Premium
· Oct 6, 2026
· 105
Will Your Favorite Animal Go To Heaven Or Hell? A Handy Guide
Here is a bonus article for all you Babylon Bee subscribers.
Premium
· Oct 5, 2026
· 62
How Was Church? Ladder Edition
It's Monday, and you know what that means! The almost obligatory "How Was Church?" post. How was your Lord's Day service? Did your pastor use any ladd...
Premium
· Oct 2, 2026
· 45
The Babylon Bee Weekly Roundup | Friday, October 2, 2026
It's Friday and that means it is time for The Babylon Bee's Weekly Roundup! We're here to catch you up on the biggest stories of the past week as repo...
Premium
· Oct 1, 2026
· 50
Office Buzz: Props!
Here at The Babylon Bee we amass a significant number of props for various projects, some of which never see the light of day. And then we kind of jus...
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