U.S.
With Fireworks Canceled, Americans Celebrate By Firing Their Many, Many Guns In The Air

U.S.—With fireworks displays around the country canceled due to COVID, millions of Americans have resorted to celebrating American independence by firing their obscene numbers of firearms into the sky in defiance of tyranny. 

While all the whiny liberals stayed inside and cried liberal tears, true patriots took to the streets in a show of force and fired approximately 328 billion rounds of ammunition into the clouds to stand up for real American values.

"Yeehaw!" Americans shouted. "Guns and America! Boy, howdy!"

Reports indicate the thunderous noise lasted over 3 hours, being heard all around the globe. Tyrants and dictators around the world cowered in their bedrooms at the sound of freedom ringing out across the land.

During the raucous party, Americans drank all the beer and ate all the burgers. They then all went to the store to stock up on more ammo.

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