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Weekend Forecast: Cloudy With High Chance Of Trump Tweetstorm

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Taking into account a fast-approaching offshore low-pressure system as well as the ongoing James Comey hearing, expert meterologists predict cloudy skies and a high probability of a “brutal” tweetstorm from President Trump over the weekend.

The mad, swirling flurry of tweets is expected to begin any minute, and could last up to the entire weekend, or until Trump gets distracted by something else.

“We’re predicting all this moisture coming up out of the south will probably push on east of us, giving us partly cloudly skies and mild temperatures, while the Trump tweetstorm is on a collision course with the entire Eastern seaboard,” a weatherman at the Severe Weather Center reported Thursday. “Board up your windows and make sure you’ve got plenty of candles, food, and board games to keep you occupied.”

“It’s gonna be a doozy,” he added.

Sources with the Trump administration also confirmed that aides were working around the clock to minimize the damage caused by the inevitable tweetstorm, hiding Trump’s phone from him for as long as possible as he viewed the Comey proceedings.

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