CULVER CITY, CA - Trans woman Amy Schneider broke a winnings record on Jeopardy last week, earning more than any female contestant in the show's history. Experts say this proves once and for all that men really are smarter than women.
"As a biological male, Schneider is once again proving the vast superiority of the male intellect," said MIT researcher Dr. Yamblo Figlenstrogg. "For better or for worse, this will be a huge boost for sexists and transphobes everywhere!"
Audience members were reportedly in awe to find that Schneider's dress and pretty hair did not negatively affect the functioning of her brilliant male brain.
"It was so inspiring to see!" said one witness. "Amy Schneider is shattering the glass ceiling for trans people everywhere, while at the same time installing a new, impenetrable, bulletproof glass ceiling for biological women that will never, ever be shattered. Take that, women!"
Unfortunately, Schnieder's Jeopardy streak was tragically cut short after being completely stumped by tonight's "3rd Grade Biology" category.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
