Top 10 Ways To Acquire Wealth Under Bidenomics
Sponsored · Oct 30, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

Brought to you by: Genesis Gold Group

Times are tough, and with the economy in such a rough shape, people are having to get more creative in order to build wealth.

To help you out, The Babylon Bee is here with an informative list of ways people are acquiring wealth under Bidenomics:

  1. Date Taylor Swift: Even if you're already wealthy, this will bring your bankroll to a whole new level.
  2. Steal stuff from California stores: Don't worry, you'll never face any consequences.
  3. Serve in Congress: Nobody increases their net worth like people who get elected to office.
  4. Open a coffee shop with string lights and pallets on the walls and sell coffee for $18 each: It works every time.
  5. Traffick human beings: Thanks to the U.S.'s open southern border, this recession-proof industry just keeps booming.
  6. Fill 3 glass bottles with bugs. Sell two of them to the beggar in Kakariko Village for 50 rupees apiece. Open the third bottle, and 3 bugs will come out. Catch all 3 and repeat the process for infinite rupees: Worked for us.
  7. Initiate a terrorist takeover of Afghanistan: You'll become filthy rich, plus you'll furnish your army with state-of-the-art military weaponry.
  8. Sell a bunch of crap rebranded with red, white, and blue colors and the word "patriot" in the name: Trust us, those conservatives will buy anything.
  9. Serve on the BLM board of directors: You'll have a real estate portfolio to die for before you know it.
  10. Be Hunter Biden: This is hands-down, the most surefire, guaranteed way to make off like a bandit.

See? You don't have to be depressed about the economy. There are plenty of ways to strike it rich in Biden's America, and some of them are even legal.


NOT SATIRE: Americans are concerned about how Bidenomics is decimating our financial futures. From de-dollarization to rampant inflation, the threats to our life's savings exacerbate anxiety at a time when we already have too much on our plates.

As a Christian precious metals company, Genesis Gold Group is changing the way Americans protect their wealth and retirement. Many companies offer retirement accounts backed by physical precious metals, but Genesis Gold Group stands out by focusing on service to God and the financial stewardship inherent in a Biblical worldview.

Genesis Gold Group has maintained a perfect 5 out of 5 rating with the Better Business Bureau because doing what's best for their customers is paramount. Learn how Genesis Gold Group is changing the precious metals industry and thereby changing the lives of its customers for the better.


By now the whole internet has heard Ben Shapiro rapping, but did you know that there are actually two more verses they cut out of the track?

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.