COLORADO SPRINGS, CO - According to a press release sent out today by publisher NavPress, The Message translation of the Scriptures is now available in an attractive edition typeset entirely in Comic Sans.

The complete text of the paraphrase of the Scriptures will be reproduced in the wacky, childlike font, with the words of Christ printed specially in Papyrus.

"We really feel the Comic Sans font best expresses The Message's fun, whimsical approach to Scripture translation," the press release stated. "And now, you too can enjoy the paraphrase in everyone's favorite font. Experience The Message's signature tortured metaphors and anachronistic references, all in the uneven, wonky font that will make your head hurt after just a few minutes of reading."

According to the press release, the new edition even includes a money-back guarantee: "If you aren't completely repulsed by the combination of strained Bible translation and distracting font choice in the first 30 days, just send it back and we'll replace it with a real Bible translation absolutely free."

The translation will also feature color illustrations comprised mainly of free Microsoft clipart strewn haphazardly through the text to accompany key Bible stories. Characters like the pixelated stick figure and even Microsoft Clippy will be combined with clipart objects and backgrounds to reenact the narratives of Noah's ark, Jonah and the whale, and more.

At publishing time, NavPress had confirmed an upcoming printing of The Message in Wingdings for a more readable, accurate translation.