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Study: 60% Of Parenting Is Locating Children's Shoes

U.S.—In a surprising study on the content of modern parenting, results show that on average, sixty percent of the job of a parent is taken up with locating kids' shoes.

"Where are your shoes?" is a frequent question in a household with children, often followed by "Do you remember where you took them off?" and sometimes with "Here's one shoe; where is the other? How did you take off your shoes in two different places?"

Scientists theorize that the part of the human brain used for retaining shoe-related knowledge simply isn't yet developed in children, which causes them to forget absolutely anything to do with their shoes as soon as they come off at some random time well after they've entered the house.

"Shoes?" replied Tommy Howard, age five, when asked about the location of his shoes. From his expression, it appeared he had not only forgotten where his shoes were but also the entire concept of shoes, including that they are something required for leaving the house.

Some parents have developed strategies to reduce the amount of time spent locating shoes, such as having their children go barefoot and never leaving the house. When successful, this leaves more time for other parenting activities such as informing a child when he is whining, repeating simple commands, and pretending to think the child's name is "Hungry”.