Health
WHO Scientists Confirm Coronavirus Only Spreads At Conservative Protests

GENEVA—W.H.O. scientists have confirmed that the coronavirus only spreads at problematic protests, like conservative rallies, Trump campaign events, and Second Amendment rights demonstrations. The study found that the coronavirus will not spread at progressive protests or violent riots.

The W.H.O. study showed that only Republicans, 2nd Amendment demonstrators, and Trump supporters can spread dangerous viruses when they break lockdown to assemble and protest, not any other kind of protesters.

"You only want people to die if you go protest for conservative causes -- otherwise, you're safe," said a W.H.O. scientist as he mixed two differently colored liquids together. They exploded and his hair went straight back, burning his face. "AHHHHH!!!"

Unfortunately, the scientist was later discovered to be a bunch of raccoons in a lab coat, so the results of the study may be suspect.

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