Tragic! This young woman was trying really hard to become a Proverbs 31 woman, so she could settle down with a husband who would provide for her and love her as Christ loved the church.
So what's the problem? After working hard to be a Proverbs 31 woman for months, she's now the proud owner of an entire field of flax she doesn't know what to do with.
Inspired by the passage at the end of the wisdom book, she purchased a field and worked hard at harvesting all the flax so that she might attract a male. But nobody even looked her direction as she labored day and night in the field. She even bought some sheep and carefully sheared them, storing up stacks and stacks of wool, but she didn't get so much as a "like" on Instagram for her efforts.
She then attempted to plant a vineyard, but nothing happened after close to an hour of waiting for the grapes to grow. Finally, the woman purchased a merchant ship and sailed afar to bring back food, but still doesn't have a husband.
Welp, honey, guess it's time to pick a different chapter of Proverbs to emulate! Just be careful which one you choose!