Church Sponsored Worldviews
Progressive Church Replaces Pew Bibles With Adult Coloring Books

HARTFORD, CT—St. Andrew’s Episcopal Church prides itself on staying on the cutting edge of progressive theology and practice. This steadfast commitment is apparent in many aspects of the ministry’s church life, including its recent decision to remove all “toxic” pew Bibles and replace them with “life-giving” adult coloring books.

“I hadn’t seen anyone pick up one of those Bibles in decades, anyway,” Reverend Rachel Schuman said Tuesday. “And thank God for that! Those things are extremely problematic and multi-phobic, in so many ways.”

“Now we have these amazing pew books that allow parishioners to doodle and color—inside or outside the lines, we won’t judge—while the blessed soul-hug is being delivered from the pulpit. This new practice better matches the vibe of the service as well as our beliefs as a faith group—calming, therapeutic, affirming, delicate—a unique path and experience for each individual,” she added. “Namaste.”

The choice for pew Bible replacements came down to either the coloring book, a copy of Chicken Soup for the Soul, or a handheld mirror, with the coloring book winning by vote. “We still may add the mirrors, though, right next to the coloring books,” Schuman revealed.

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