COLLEGE STATION, TX - On a cloudless Sunday morning, lightning struck Pastor Preston Greenfield during the middle of a sermon when he referenced his wife but failed to describe her as "smokin' hot".
"God is a God of justice after all," said long-time parishioner Philip Vargas. "He really is a good pastor, and I wish him a quick recovery. But there's a line you don't cross, and he crossed it."
Pastor Greenfield was reportedly preaching through a passage in Colossians when he launched into an amusing anecdote about the difference in how men and women do dishes. In a moment of reckless prattling, Pastor Greenfield mentioned his "beautiful" wife, and the horrified congregation ducked for cover.
"Sometimes a pastor can get so into the weeds with complex hermeneutics, they forget Seminary 101," said deacon Joe Gilts. "Frankly, God was pretty merciful a few weeks ago when the Pastor prayed for a 'fence' of protection instead of a 'hedge'. Amateur hour."
At publishing time, Pastor Greenfield was reportedly recovering at the hospital surrounded by his smokin' hot wife, brilliant children, gracious in-laws, and a great hedge of protection.