Family
Overachieving Father Knows All His Kids' Names, Ages

EL PASO, TX—Local overachieving father Edgar Galvez knows all his children's names and ages. He even knows their birthdays and a few interesting facts about them.

Amazed sources reported that Galvez can recite his children's exact ages and names from memory.

"Yes, we have Oscar, who's 7, and Grace is 6," he said when a coworker recently asked if he had kids. "And my wife is currently 16 weeks and 2 days pregnant." He then proceeded to amaze bystanders by reciting both his children's middle names without looking it up on his phone or texting his wife to ask her.

"He's really making the rest of us look bad," complained another coworker looking on. "What's next -- am I going to be expected to remember what grade my kids are in? It's like, let's keep the expectations low. Settle down, teacher's pet."

At publishing time, sources had further confirmed that Galvez knows his wife's birthday.

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