NEW YORK, NY—Star Democratic political candidate Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez finally accepted a challenge to debate her economic plan with Count von Count, esteemed number expert from Sesame Street, on a special guest appearance that aired Friday.
The congressional candidate got into a heated exchange with the legendary counting expert, fumbling her words as he calmly tallied up the trillions of dollars she hadn’t accounted for in her proposals.
“The number of the day is… 30 trillion dollars! Ah! Ah! Ah!” the Count began in his opening statement, as a number “30” puppet followed by a bunch of zeroes started dancing behind him. “Vhat is your plan for vinding this kind of money?”
“Like, we like, pay for other things and just like, invent money and stuff to pay for national security and stuff, so why can’t we invent trillions for making jobs and healthcare and education?” she responded, but the Count was ready with a helpful chart that pointed out that the existing programs she referred to didn’t total anywhere near the cost of her proposals.
“ONE failed politico-economic worldview—Ah! Ah! Ah!” the Count said, dealing a fatal blow as Ocasio-Cortez stormed off the set.
At publishing time, she had tweeted that the Count’s offer to debate was akin to “catcalling” and that Sesame Streetproducers should have labeled the segment as satirical.
Breaking: Paypal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered Paypal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added Paypal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.