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New, More Masculine Razor Shaves Beards Back On

U.S.—A lot of men have been looking for an alternative to Gillette once the company went "woke," and now, they may have found the right replacement.

This new, more masculine razor will shave your beard back on.

The "Macho3" razor, produced by Manlymen Razor Corp, promises to give you the best shave of your life by putting a healthy, masculine beard on your face. It promises to get rid of your shame and regret from shaving your beard with a Gillette razor and instantly produce a full, manly growth of hair all across your face.

"Most razors end up giving you annoying little nicks and cuts and also make you look like a little man-baby," said Manlymen CEO Dwayne Manson. "Our razor promises not to cut you or make you look like a man-child or a woman because it will give you that healthy, long-beard look that God designed men to have."

Macho3 razors work with patented FusionBeard Technology. FusionBeard is cutting-edge, proprietary tech that absorbs manliness from nearby sources like muscle cars, heavy metal music, tattoos, and the energy given off when a man is a good husband and father to his family. Then, it expends this energy to weave lifelike beards that it can spit back out into your pores.

"Say goodbye to that feminine, shaved look, and say hello to the best shave of your life."

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