NEW YORK, NY—In a modern miracle reminiscent of Hannukah, the Engelberg family announced that a roll of toilet paper in their household lasted for a full eight days.
During a trip to the household "throne room," family patriarch Benjamin Engelberg began looking for the customary rolls of toilet paper they traditionally use. "Oy vey -- only one roll left!" he declared. Gathering the family together, Engelberg prayed to G-d that they would find more toilet paper. But then, something incredible happened. After each trip to the bathroom, the Engelberg family found that there was always just enough toilet paper to use.
"It's a miracle! Thank HaShem!" Engelberg cried in delight.
Finally, during a trip to Target, Mrs. Sarah Engelberg found a package of Charmin, and the family was saved. To remember this incredible miracle, Jews everywhere will be celebrating this week each year going forward, with the giving of gifts, the spinning of dreidels, and the daily unrolling of the eight rolls of toilet paper.
Breaking: PayPal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered PayPal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added PayPal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.