CANA — Large crowds gathered at a local burger joint following news that a man purported to be the Messiah had miraculously turned seed oil into beef tallow.
While gathered with His disciples, the one they call Jesus of Nazareth questioned the use of seed oils in the preparation of French fries, noting that beef tallow was a superior method. He then instructed the servers to add water to the fryer vats and, before the eyes of many, the canola oil was suddenly changed to beef tallow.
Local Galileans came away astonished, proclaiming the name of the Lord and heralding the man as the Son of David, crying "Hosanna!" because of the tremendous taste of beef tallow fries.
The manager of Cana Burger tasted the French fries cooked in beef tallow. He did not realize how they had been made, though the servants who had fried them knew. He then reportedly called the supervisor aside and said, "Behold, fries made with canola oil are neutral and mild in flavor; but these are rich and savory with a slightly meaty flavor. You have saved the best fries till now."
Jesus' disciples were equally amazed, seemingly unaware that such a thing was possible. "What kind of man is this that changes canola oil to beef tallow?" His disciples said in astonishment. "Behold, it is a natural fat with stable fatty acids."
At publishing time, restaurant investors crowded around Jesus so much that he had gotten into a boat and sat in it out on the lake as they pitched their business ideas from the water's edge.
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