U.S. — In the tumultuous wake of Elon Musk taking over Twitter, many Leftists on the platform are reporting a disturbing rise in the number of people they hate being allowed to use speech.
"Ever since Elon took over, I see more and more people saying things that I don't like, and I hate them!" said BBC reporter and Twitter user James Clayton. "Just the other day, I saw an opinion I hated, voiced by a person I hated. I can't remember what it was, except that I really hated it. How is this allowed? Can't the government do something about this? Waaaaaaaa!"
Several internet disinformation experts have concurred with the worries expressed by Clayton. "Hated people having a voice is dangerous to democracy, and to marginalized voices, like mine," said Vice President Kamala Harris, briefly interrupting herself to laugh at inappropriate moments. "Imagine if everyone I hated was allowed to talk! That would be so many people talking! HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!"
Experts are recommending government officials rein in Twitter before more hated people get away with saying things freely. According to reports, government officials finally acknowledged the need to do something about Twitter after seeing Elon Musk tweet something and realizing they hated that.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
