ATLANTA, GA — An impatient liberal journalist employed by CNN began to express doubts this week that President Trump will ever send her to a concentration camp.
Sources said that Ginny Balton, a field reporter based in Atlanta, felt well-informed until only recently when she had to report on Trump exposing more government fraud and limiting the power of government, which was nothing at all like the actions of Adolf Hitler.
"I thought for sure we'd all be rounded up by now," Balton reportedly confided in colleagues. "Why isn't Trump having his secret police lining us all up and randomly executing a few of us before sending us all to work at a labor camp? I've seen Schindler's List. I know how this is supposed to go."
According to reports, it had been difficult for mainstream media journalists to report on Trump's presidential actions because they bear the mark of a patriot who cares deeply about the American people — not the impending imprisonment and execution of 6 million journalists.
Balton said she tried to find solace in her work, but every piece of good news she reports about Trump and the future of the country just reminds her how far she is from experiencing persecution.
"How can I live like this?" she asked.
At publishing time, Ginny Balton had reportedly also begun to suspect that President Trump would not, in reality, be exiling Hollywood celebrities to Siberia and forcing gay people into straight marriages at gunpoint.
Meet Devyn. The 16-year-old Chick-fil-A worker who has replaced the entire government.
