Progressive Dusts Off 'My Body, My Choice' Sign She Put In Storage At Beginning Of The Pandemic
Politics · May 5, 2022 · BabylonBee.com

PORTLAND, OR - Local progressive Juniper Clouts has once again become outraged this week, this time causing her to go searching for her old signs that express her anger about the current thing. Luckily, she found her old "My Body, My Choice" sign she had tucked away at the beginning of the pandemic. 

"Ah good as new," said Juniper, dusting off the old sign. "I missed not being able to hold you up after those backward, idiotic anti-vaxxers started trying to use you too."

"Bodily autonomy only applies to us women trying to abort another body - I mean a clump of cells. It clearly doesn't apply to the government telling you to inject a foreign, experimental substance into your own body," continued Juniper. "Why is that so hard for people to understand?"

According to sources, Juniper Clouts was then spotted at a local pro-abortion protest shouting things like "MY BABY'S BODY, MY CHOICE", and  "Keep the government off my body, unless they want to vaxx me again, then it's ok."

At publishing time, Juniper realized she was actually protesting at an anti-mandate rally. She immediately fell to her knees and tore her beloved sign in half while shouting "NOOOOOOO!"


World, meet Travis. Travis, meet the world. In this first episode of our new show Travis Interviews the World, we interview some guy named Jordan Peterson.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.