EAST AURORA, NY - In a show of solidarity with a vocal minority of gender activists who don't purchase their products, Fisher-Price introduced the "My First Gender Transition" playset for kids ages 2 to 9.
"The My First Gender Transition playset helps your child have a fun time playing pretend while in no way being inculcated with an emotionally destructive ideology," said Product Manager Murthina Spillwig who may soon be updating her resumé. "Parents in our focus groups were excited to force their kids to pretend to enjoy the playset for Instagram."
The playset is bursting with a plethora of features to confuse your toddler, including:
-My First Gonadotropin-Releasing Hormone Analogue puberty-blocking toy syringe
-Top Surgery For Tykes toy surgical table
-Barnyard and jungle-themed breast binders and packing underwear
-Therapist doll that, when squeezed, whispers, "Don't tell your parents."
-A lifesize poster of inspiring role model Dr. Rachel Levine
In anticipation of the success of the gender-affirming playset, Fisher-Price has announced they will soon be releasing the "My First Detransition" playset.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
