WASHINGTON, D.C. — Lost amid the media scrutiny of Elon Musk's appearance with President Donald Trump at the White House yesterday to take questions regarding the Department of Government Efficiency was Musk warning his son, Lil X, not to touch that bag of white powder he found under the Oval Office desk.
The younger Musk made headlines of his own while playfully interacting with his father, the president, and the media during the press conference but was sternly told not to mess with the plastic baggy of an ambiguous powdered substance that seemed to have been stashed out of sight.
"Don't touch that, X! You don't know where it's been," Musk paused to tell his son while answering a reporter's question. "I'm fairly certain it's not powdered sugar. Just leave it alone and we'll have the Secret Service dispose of it just like all the other little bags of white powder we've found here in the last three weeks."
The president said the disposal of such bags was an ongoing process. "Lots of bags. Lots of powder," Trump said. "Every nook and cranny of the White House was a stash apparently. So much blow you wouldn't believe it. The Lincoln Bedroom looked like a ski resort when we moved in, okay? Our chef tried to bake some cookies and discovered that the flour jar was filled with cocaine. The cookies were terrible. Bad stuff, folks."
At publishing time, White House staff informed Musk that it would be sure to get out Joe Biden's Touch & Learn Activity Desk the next time Lil X visited the Oval Office.
Meet Devyn. The 16-year-old Chick-fil-A worker who has replaced the entire government.
