NEW YORK, NY — Researchers are reporting that disinformation on Twitter, Facebook, and mainstream news sources is already down by 92% in the wake of a 24-hour writer's strike at the New York Times.
"We always wondered where all this harmful disinformation was coming from," said Darryl Ball, a researcher with the Center for Combatting Bad Things Online. "Turns out, it was all coming from those knuckleheads at the Times. Who knew?"
Several studies indicate the country has seen a sharp decrease in hate speech, foreign propaganda, and shockingly dumb hot takes since the entire writing staff walked out of the building in New York City, which experts believe could lead to an outbreak of peace and harmony across the nation.
"All this time, the threat to democracy was us all along!" said NYT Union Boss Fuggs Crullers to reporters from other news organizations not on strike. "We have begun negotiations with leadership to pay us more money to never come back to work in hopes of saving America."
At publishing time, all other news outlets around the country reported feeling "lost" as they were so used to just copying and pasting from the New York Times each morning.
Watch as a fired Twitter employee applies for her first *actual* job: