REDMOND, OR — A lost afternoon nap threatened to ruin the entire day of local dad Stephen Hearst, who was now clinically fussy, sources said.
The predicament presented itself when Hearst, who was already tired from a late night the night before, had to get up early, and a last-minute logistical problem with his wife and kids precluded him from having his mid-day nap.
"I'm tired,' Hearst, a father of three, said Friday afternoon. "This is my one day off work, and I wanted to sleep through it, BUT NOW MY DAY IS RUINED!"
Insiders said Hearst, who manages a nearby AutoZone, was now decidedly cranky and inconsolable since he lost his chance to nap, and he wanted to make sure everyone knew it.
"Now I'm off my routine," he said. "I was lying on the couch, drifting into a nap, and then Sheila called to say she can't pick up the kids from school. That threw me off schedule, and now I'm over-tired. This whole thing is mildly irritating, and it probably means everyone around me is going to have a long night."
Sources close to the Hearst family confirmed that Stephen was fussier than usual leading up to dinner, with his wife whispering that she would have to put him down early.
At publishing time, Stephen Hearst had calmed down just in time for the ball game but slipped into a deep depression after his team, the Seattle Mariners, lost.
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