Church Staff Learns Fresh Batch Of Buzzwords That Will Be Meaningless In Six Months
Church · May 12, 2017 · BabylonBee.com

ATLANTA, GA - Staff at Liferevival Collective were reportedly "totally stoked" to learn dozens of new buzzwords at the church's vision meeting Thursday, inside sources reported.

The church reportedly gathers every six months to vision-cast key terms together, just as the previous crop of buzzwords have expired into nonsense, in an attempt to stay fresh and take the growing congregation to the next level of incarnational ministry.

"I'm excited to focus on concepts like 'synergy' and 'visioneering' for the next few months, until those words mean absolutely nothing," youth pastor Jake Cameron reportedly told one of his interns. "Back in 2013, we really tried to rally around the idea of being 'missional,' which I think mostly consists of playing lots of video games and hanging out - you know, doing life together. That was one of my faves."

"'Loving on people' is up there too - what a shelf life that one had," Cameron added. "There's rumors of folks down in the Bible belt still saying it."

At publishing time, Cameron revealed that they had gathered all of this season's terms into a Google doc titled "Community-Centric, Sustainable Growth In Our Market's Mindshare."

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