Church Entertaining Trade Offers For Weird Family With 15-Passenger Van
Church · Jul 25, 2017 ·

SCOTTSBLUFF, KS - With the trade deadline looming, Grace Community Church has reportedly been "aggressively shopping" the Campbells, a "loyal but eccentric" family of ten with a several-year-old 15-passenger van, looking for buyers willing to absorb their membership contract.

The church is widely rumored to be looking to beef up its younger, up-and-coming prospects, and doesn't have the infrastructure to support the couple and their kids.

"We're considering all offers," pastor Chuck Cooper said in a press conference. "They're a solid family, good tithes and offerings each week, good small group attendance, with lots of potential for growth. We just don't really have a good spot for them in our various programs, and we're really in need of a few college-aged kids."

"And frankly, they're a little weird with all them kids and what not - but don't let that scare you off. There's still a lot of upside there."

Cooper further stated that the church would also consider trades for women who could sing harmony or those who "make a mean casserole".

The Campbells didn't answer their farm's landline in request for comment, and do not have cellular phones.

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.