RED RIDGE, WV—The Netherton family, known by their neighbors as "that nice but kinda weird homeschooling family," was forced to buy another 15-passenger van after their current commercial-class van ran out of window space for stick figure kids again.
"We just need to upgrade to something with a lot more window space to keep up with all these stick figure kids we keep having to add to our decal," said Fred Netherton, family patriarch and full-time construction project manager. "They just don't make vans like they used to, where you could slap 100 stick figure kids on the window no problem."
His wife, Kathy, agreed. "I've got triplets in the oven right now," she said as she made dinner, taught 36 of their kids math and 10 others English, and cleaned the house. "As soon as Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego pop out, we're gonna be completely out of room on the back of our van."
"It's really sad to see more vehicle manufacturers don't make massive windows to contain all these adorable, precious little decals."
The Netherton's Mormon neighbors chuckled.
Breaking: Paypal Now Available
Many of you told us you wouldn't subscribe until we offered Paypal as a payment option. You apparently weren't bluffing, so we finally caved and added Paypal. Now — like the unbeliever faced with God's invisible qualities displayed in nature — you are without excuse.