WASHINGTON, D.C. — Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, star congressghost and the world's smartest socialist, revealed today that ghost has been using ghost/ghostself pronouns to refer to ghostself ever since ghost was murdered in the January 6 protests at the capitol building.

"Actually, I refer to ghostself as ghost/ghostself now," ghost told reporters after one deadpronouned ghost by calling ghost "she." "When those Trump supporters walked around the Capitol taking selfies, I suddenly felt a great disturbance in the general, you know, vibe of the day. I knew something was wrong. So when I saw on Twitter that the insurrectionists were insurrecting things, I began fearing for my life. And then I died."

When asked how ghost was still standing there talking to reporters about ghost's experience that fateful day, ghost replied, "I got better."

Editor's note: the writer who typed this headline misgendered Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez with the incorrect pronoun "she" and has been fired and reported to the FBI, IRS, and PayPal.

World, meet Travis. Travis, meet the world. In this first episode of our new show Travis Interviews the World, we interview some guy named Jordan Peterson.