8 Revolutionary Ways To Improve Your Sleep
Sponsored · Jun 6, 2023 · BabylonBee.com

Brought to you by: Relaxium

Let's face it, getting good sleep can be tough these days! From the busyness of parenting fussy children to the stress of the day's news, there's always something keeping you awake.

The Babylon Bee is here with a list of helpful tips to get a good night's sleep.

  1. Only watch TikTok videos until 1 AM instead of 2 AM: That extra hour of sleep can make all the difference. Who needs to watch another video of dancing nurses anyway? Ok, maybe just one more.
  2. Pour whiskey on your evening Lucky Charms instead of milk: Add a new flavor to your Lucky Charms and be passed out before you know it.
  3. Watch Rogue One: All the fun of a Star Wars movie without any recognizable characters, music, or sense of humor.
  4. Stay up for three days straight to get extra tired: And then put some whiskey in your Lucky Charms.
  5. Watch WNBA highlight videos: Nothing puts people to sleep like watching people play basketball at half-speed with no slam dunks.
  6. Read biblical genealogies: Knowing so-and-so begat so-and-so is food for your spirit and instant sleep.
  7. Ask your spouse to tell you about their day: Boom. Instant sleep.
  8. Have your spouse hit you on the head with a huge cartoon mallet: If it's good enough for Bugs Bunny, it's good enough for you.

Try out a few of the ideas listed above. You're sure to enjoy the best sleep of your life!


NOT SATIRE: Get America's #1 Most Trusted Sleep Aid and Rest Better Now! Limited Time Offer: 30% Off via This Link Only: Relaxium® Sleep | Clinically Studied to Help You Stay Asleep Longer & Fall Asleep Easier


Want proof that Jesus was a woke socialist? Look no further than these classic quotes straight from the Bible.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.