$400M Ticketmaster Settlement Reduced To Just $11.50 After Fees

Business · Apr 17, 2026 · BabylonBee.com
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NEW YORK, NY — A New York federal court found Ticketmaster guilty of operating as a monopoly following its 2010 merger with concert promoter Live Nation, and ordered the ticket vendor to pay $400 million in fines, which came out to just $11.50 after service fees.

The Department of Justice argued that the American ticket sales and distribution company violated antitrust laws with practices designed to unfairly stifle competition in the marketplace and artificially drive up ticket prices and fees for all manner of events, including their own court case.

"Booking the court date with Ticketmaster was probably a mistake," said lead counsel Jeffrey Kessler. "That's my bad."

Attorneys for Ticketmaster issued a statement vowing to have the case overturned on appeal. "This case is an affront to American law. You harass our client over convenience fees, but there is nothing convenient about any of this. Thankfully, the settlement amount got knocked down to just $11.50."

As a result of the current ruling, Ticketmaster CEO Michael Rapino announced several changes to company policy, including renaming the term "fee" to "generous donation."

At publishing time, ticket prices rose to pay for Ticketmaster's legal expenses.


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