Are you being persecuted for your faith? Oh no! That's not good! We Americans are experts in persecution, so we want to equip you with the tools you need to survive!
Here are some clever ways to avoid religious persecution:
- Wear a Spider-Man costume when you go to the church so no one will recognize you: But then you might be persecuted by J. Jonah Jameson.
- If someone asks if you're a Christian just shout, "BLACK LIVES MATTER!" and run away: If you try to share the gospel out of love for their souls they'll get you. Don't fall for it!
- Get a rainbow "Ally" tattoo on your face: Everyone will then know you're not a bigot. Only bigots get persecuted.
- Say, "Why don't you persecute someone your own size?": Works great on lions in the Colosseum.
- Join a woke church because they have no persecution and no faith: Plus, you get to do whatever you want! YAY, SIN!
- Hide your faith under a bushel basket: They're on sale at Target right now.
- If they catch you praying tell them you're praying to Dr. Fauci: It is always culturally acceptable to pray to Lord Fauci.
- Consider being spiritual, not religious: It worked for the Romans. Until it didn't.
- Stop considering Twitter arguments as persecution: Weird, most of your persecution just disappeared, didn't it?
- Live in America: Bad news is you may have to give up your gas stove.
NOT SATIRE: There is a struggle in Africa between Christians and Islamic extremists and the story has been left untold. Radicals are targeting and slaughtering Christians in the northern and now central regions of Nigeria daily. Entire villages have been burned, wives have lost their husbands, and children are left without families every day.
In 2020, Executive Director, Judd Saul, recognized the rise in Christian persecution and resolved to take action by founding Equipping the Persecuted.
Galatians 6:10 says, "Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially those who belong to the family of believers."
Equipping the Persecuted is a boots-on-the-ground organization whose focus is to protect, rebuild, and strengthen families affected by terrorism in both body and spirit. They are prepared to respond after an attack within 24 hours
Their impact spreads into widow and orphan ministry, security awareness training, medical interventions within IDP camps, digging water wells, and installing alarm systems to give villagers an extra window of time to escape before an attack happens.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.