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Kids Excited To Learn Of Cool Alternative To Vaping Called 'Smoking Cigarettes' - Article image
Lifestyle · May 16, 2026 · 52
Kids Excited To Learn Of Cool Alternative To Vaping Called 'Smoking Cigarettes'

U.S. - Teenagers across the nation are discovering a hip new alternative to vaping, called "smoking cigarettes."

Uncultured Philistine Declines To Have Ice Cream Served In Waffle Cone - Article image
Lifestyle · May 16, 2026 · 37
Uncultured Philistine Declines To Have Ice Cream Served In Waffle Cone

TUCSON, AZ - Local man Dale Swanson declined to have his double scoops of mint chocolate chip and strawberry ice cream served in a delicious waffle co...

Associated Press Warns That Trebuchets Are Exempt From U.S. Gun Laws - Article image
Media · May 16, 2026 · 75
Associated Press Warns That Trebuchets Are Exempt From U.S. Gun Laws

U.S. - The Associated Press has warned that despite their deadly nature, medieval trebuchets are mostly exempt from firearm regulations in the United ...
London Mayor Confused By Protesters Not Chanting ‘Death To Jews’
London Mayor Confused By Protesters Not Chanting ‘Death To Jews’
London Mayor Confused By Protesters Not Chanting ‘Death To Jews’ - Featured article image
World · May 17, 2026 · 23

LONDON - London Mayor Sadiq Khan was deeply confused by protests over the weekend where no one was shouting "Death To Jews."

Nation Just Realized Chelsea Handler Has Been Trying To Be Funny This Whole Time - Article image
Entertainment · May 15, 2026 · 74
Nation Just Realized Chelsea Handler Has Been Trying To Be Funny This Whole Time

U.S. - According to overnight reports, a dumbfounded nation at last realized that Chelsea Handler has actually been trying to be funny this whole time...

Entertainment · May 15, 2026 · 74
Nation Just Realized Chelsea Handler Has Been Trying To Be Funny This Whole Time

Nation Just Realized Chelsea Handler Has Been Trying To Be Funny This Whole Time - Featured article image
U.S. - According to overnight reports, a dumbfounded nation at last realized that Chelsea Handler has actually been trying to be funny this whole time...
Associated Press Warns That Trebuchets Are Exempt From U.S. Gun Laws - Article image
Media · May 16, 2026 · 75
Associated Press Warns That Trebuchets Are Exempt From U.S. Gun Laws

U.S. - The Associated Press has warned that despite their deadly nature, medieval trebuchets are mostly exempt from firearm regulations in the United ...

Subscriber Headlines

Guests At Homeschool Graduation Told To Hold Applause Until Both Names Are Read

May 13, 2026 | BrotherTim


“And How Did This Quarter Get Behind Your Ear?” Asks Moses To Pharaoh’s Stunned Magicians

May 14, 2026 | BrotherTim


Bluesky Introduces Profile Badge For Users Who Have Attempted To Assassinate Trump

May 12, 2026 | Local Jerk

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Millennial Figures Out How To Use '6-7,' Signaling The End Of The Fad - Article image
Millennial Figures Out How To Use '6-7,' Signaling The End Of The Fad
Culture · May 15, 2026 · 54
Lakewood Church To Be Renamed 'DraftKings Arena' Following Branding Deal - Article image
Lakewood Church To Be Renamed 'DraftKings Arena' Following Branding Deal
Church · May 15, 2026 · 50
Disney Purchases Rights To 'Robot Jox' Franchise In Blockbuster $7 Billion Deal - Article image
Disney Purchases Rights To 'Robot Jox' Franchise In Blockbuster $7 Billion Deal
Entertainment · May 15, 2026 · 42
Man Just 17 Home Depot Trips Away From Purchasing Correct Light Bulbs - Article image
Man Just 17 Home Depot Trips Away From Purchasing Correct Light Bulbs
Life · May 15, 2026 · 72
Hockey Ticket Holders Issued Refund After No Fights Break Out - Article image
Hockey Ticket Holders Issued Refund After No Fights Break Out
Sports · May 15, 2026 · 40
Keir Starmer Admits He Has No Idea How To Pronounce His Own Name - Article image
Keir Starmer Admits He Has No Idea How To Pronounce His Own Name
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'The New York Times' Updates Slogan To 'All The News That’s Fit To Print Plus Any Rumor No Matter How Implausible' - Article image
Media · May 15, 2026 · 70
'The New York Times' Updates Slogan To 'All The News That’s Fit To Print Plus Any Rumor No Matter How Implausible'

NEW YORK, NY - The New York Times, one of the country's most venerated newspapers, announced it was adapting to trying times by changing its longtime ...
Faux Pas: Trump Gifts President Xi With Pot Of Honey From White House Beehive - Article image
Politics · May 14, 2026 · 63
Faux Pas: Trump Gifts President Xi With Pot Of Honey From White House Beehive

BEIJING - President Donald Trump's meeting with Chinese President Xi Jinping was going swimmingly until Trump made a crucial (but common) error: gifti...
Report: CIA Raided By CIA - Article image
U.S. · May 15, 2026 · 38
Report: CIA Raided By CIA

LANGLEY, VA - Rumors swirled throughout the international intelligence community this week after reports surfaced that agents from the Central Intelli...
Mechanic Has No Idea How Dodge Caravan Still Running - Article image
Life · May 14, 2026 · 74
Mechanic Has No Idea How Dodge Caravan Still Running

TEMPE, AZ - After taking a look under the hood of the Barton family's Dodge Caravan, local mechanic Terry Ricks admitted that he has absolutely no clu...

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The NYTimes Reveals: 7 More Shocking Things Israel Has Trained Animals To Do - Article image
Sponsored · May 13, 2026 · 59
The NYTimes Reveals: 7 More Shocking Things Israel Has Trained Animals To Do

As you may have heard, The New York Times revealed this week that Israel has a secret animal training program that literally teaches dogs how to water...
BREAKING: Wife Seems Upset; UPDATE: False Alarm — She Said 'I'm Fine' - Article image
Family · May 13, 2026 · 115
BREAKING: Wife Seems Upset; UPDATE: False Alarm — She Said 'I'm Fine'

AKRON, OH - Curtis Whitaker noticed some subtle differences in his wife, Janie. Her face seemed on the verge of a frown as she kept glancing at him, a...
Man Helpfully Points Out To Wife That She Looks Tired - Article image
Family · May 14, 2026 · 48
Man Helpfully Points Out To Wife That She Looks Tired

TOPEKA, KS - Local hero Greg Miller was praised this week for his keen observation skills after courageously informing his wife, Sarah, that she looke...
'The View' Announces All-New Cast Of Angry, Middle-Aged Women - Article image
Media · May 12, 2026 · 105
'The View' Announces All-New Cast Of Angry, Middle-Aged Women

U.S. - Longtime daytime talk show "The View" has announced that next season will feature an all-new cast of angry middle-aged women.

Don't Miss

Church Bassist Discovers His Amp Has Been Unplugged For Past 20 Years - Article image
Church · Mar 20, 2017 · 6
Church Bassist Discovers His Amp Has Been Unplugged For Past 20 Years

SAVANNAH, GA - Christroads Community Church bassist Jimmy Bernard suddenly realized Sunday that his bass amp has been unplugged for the past two decad...
13 Things Trump Is Now Allowed To Do After Supreme Court Immunity Ruling - Article image
13 Things Trump Is Now Allowed To Do After Supreme Court Immunity Ruling
Sponsored · Jul 1, 2024 · 132
Jordan Peterson Explains The Deep Meaning Behind 9 Famous Song Lyrics - Article image
Jordan Peterson Explains The Deep Meaning Behind 9 Famous Song Lyrics
Entertainment · Mar 19, 2025 · 114
Can You Spot All 10 Signs Of Fascism In This Photo Of Trump's Rally? - Article image
Can You Spot All 10 Signs Of Fascism In This Photo Of Trump's Rally?
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Anonymous White House Source Claims Trump Punched A Baby - Article image
Anonymous White House Source Claims Trump Punched A Baby
Politics · Sep 4, 2020 · 98
Devastated Stephen Curry Discovers Context Of Philippians 4:13 - Article image
Devastated Stephen Curry Discovers Context Of Philippians 4:13
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Bailiffs Cast Lots For Trump’s Clothing - Article image
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Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition - Article image
Premium · May 5, 2026 · 47
Photo Caption Challenge Winner: Trump And The Bees Edition

Last week, we put out the challenge to our intrepid subscribers to caption this glorious photo of Trump with a bee. After sifting through the stack of...
Photo Caption Challenge: Trump And The Bees - Article image
Premium · Apr 28, 2026 · 159
Photo Caption Challenge: Trump And The Bees

Trump created quite a scene today when he showed off the beehive from the White House South Lawn to the visiting king of England. Write your best capt...
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 25
New On Bee Minus! The Buzz #041: The Matter With Muslims

Muslims are in the news this week after two Pennsylvania teenagers crossed into New York City for what could have been a normal day enjoying the city ...
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test - Article image
Premium · Mar 12, 2026 · 37
New Video - Which One Is A Terrorist? | Unconscious Bias Test

Do you think you can guess the terrorist in this thumbnail? If so, you are a racist. Unconscious bias is a type of systematically deeply integrated so...

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Alyssa Milano Confirms FBI Investigators Have Not Reached Out To Her To Get A Celebrity's Opinion On Kavanaugh Yet - Article image
Alyssa Milano Confirms FBI Investigators Have Not Reached Out To Her To Get A Celebrity's Opinion On Kavanaugh Yet
Politics · Oct 2, 2018 · 13
Florida Recount Finally Wraps Up, Al Gore Declared President - Article image
Florida Recount Finally Wraps Up, Al Gore Declared President
Politics · Nov 9, 2018 · 34
Trump Says To Drink Lots Of Water, Media Reports He Told Everyone To Drown Themselves - Article image
Trump Says To Drink Lots Of Water, Media Reports He Told Everyone To Drown Themselves
Politics · Apr 24, 2020 · 16
Nation's Nerds Wake Up In Utopia Where Everyone Stays Inside, Sports Are Canceled, Social Interaction Forbidden - Article image
Nation's Nerds Wake Up In Utopia Where Everyone Stays Inside, Sports Are Canceled, Social Interaction Forbidden
Health · Mar 12, 2020 · 16
Inspiring: Celebrities Spell Out 'We're All In This Together' With Their Yachts - Article image
Inspiring: Celebrities Spell Out 'We're All In This Together' With Their Yachts
Lifestyle · Apr 27, 2020 · 46
Warren Returns To Tribe In Shame After Failing To Take Land Back From The Pale Faces - Article image
Warren Returns To Tribe In Shame After Failing To Take Land Back From The Pale Faces
Politics · Mar 5, 2020 · 20

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