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Democrat Voters Excited To See Who Party Will Unilaterally Nominate Next - Article image
Politics · Jul 11, 2026 · 51
Democrat Voters Excited To See Who Party Will Unilaterally Nominate Next

AUGUSTA, ME - With their ballots now chucked in the garbage, Democratic voters are once again excitedly waiting to see who the Party leaders will choo...

Man Informs Wife He Can't Mow The Lawn Today As He Is Busy Playing Lawn Mowing Simulator - Article image
Family · Jul 12, 2026 · 60
Man Informs Wife He Can't Mow The Lawn Today As He Is Busy Playing Lawn Mowing Simulator

BIRMINGHAM, AL - Local man Brett Callahan informed his wife that he wouldn't be able to mow the lawn today as he was completely tied up playing a lawn...

Uh Oh: Mamdani's New NYC Map Includes 'Little Auschwitz' In Brooklyn - Article image
U.S. · Jul 11, 2026 · 66
Uh Oh: Mamdani's New NYC Map Includes 'Little Auschwitz' In Brooklyn

NEW YORK CITY - Concerns over Mayor Zohran Mamdani's "Immigrant Enclave Map" have grown after it was noted that the Mayor had added a "Little Auschwit...
Candace Owens Confirmed To Be A Jewish Plot To Make Antisemites Look Retarded
Candace Owens Confirmed To Be A Jewish Plot To Make Antisemites Look Retarded
Candace Owens Confirmed To Be A Jewish Plot To Make Antisemites Look Retarded - Featured article image
Celebs · Jul 10, 2026 · 83

U.S. - The White House confirmed on Friday what many had long suspected: that podcast host Candace Owens is an elaborate Jewish plot to make antisemit...

Romance In The Air As Wife Not Wearing Mouthguard - Article image
Family · Jul 10, 2026 · 82
Romance In The Air As Wife Not Wearing Mouthguard

ABILENE, KS - Romance was in the air at the Farris household as wife Allison was seen getting ready for bed without her mouthguard in place.

Family · Jul 10, 2026 · 82
Romance In The Air As Wife Not Wearing Mouthguard

Romance In The Air As Wife Not Wearing Mouthguard - Featured article image
ABILENE, KS - Romance was in the air at the Farris household as wife Allison was seen getting ready for bed without her mouthguard in place.
Uh Oh: Mamdani's New NYC Map Includes 'Little Auschwitz' In Brooklyn - Article image
U.S. · Jul 11, 2026 · 66
Uh Oh: Mamdani's New NYC Map Includes 'Little Auschwitz' In Brooklyn

NEW YORK CITY - Concerns over Mayor Zohran Mamdani's "Immigrant Enclave Map" have grown after it was noted that the Mayor had added a "Little Auschwit...

Subscriber Headlines

Trump Nukes Iran For The Finale In Unforgettable July 4th Firework Show

Jul 6, 2026 | TwoDegreesOff


Platner Still Polling Well With Rapists

Jul 6, 2026 | DustyNederlander


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Jun 29, 2026 | BrotherTim

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Newsom: 'We Finna Teach Da Homies To Talk Black English Yo' - Article image
Education · Jul 10, 2026 · 103
Newsom: 'We Finna Teach Da Homies To Talk Black English Yo'

SACRAMENTO, CA - Following reports that activists were pushing the introduction of Black English in California preschools, Governor Gavin Newsom proud...
Activists Push For California Schools To Teach 'Girl Math' - Article image
Education · Jul 9, 2026 · 149
Activists Push For California Schools To Teach 'Girl Math'

SACRAMENTO, CA - Buoyed by recent efforts to teach "Black English" in California schools, a new coalition of activists demanded that "Girl Math" be of...
10 Best Candidates To Replace Graham Platner - Article image
Politics · Jul 8, 2026 · 110
10 Best Candidates To Replace Graham Platner

Democrats are scrambling to come up with alternate options in the race for a U.S. Senate seat in Maine, where primary winner Graham Platner faces moun...
Democrats Worried Platner Might Decide To Force Himself Onto Ballot Without Party's Consent - Article image
Politics · Jul 10, 2026 · 48
Democrats Worried Platner Might Decide To Force Himself Onto Ballot Without Party's Consent

AUGUSTA, ME - The Democratic Party reportedly grew concerned that former candidate Graham Platner might force himself onto the ballot without the part...

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Can You Spot All The Signs Of Racism In This Patriotic Picture? - Article image
Life · Jul 5, 2022 · 335
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Racism is everywhere - especially on July 4th! To be a good anti-racist, you must train yourself to see racism everywhere and then loudly and obnoxiou...
Nazi Really Regretting Getting Graham Platner Tattoo - Article image
Politics · Jul 9, 2026 · 63
Nazi Really Regretting Getting Graham Platner Tattoo

BANGOR, ME - In the wake of the Democratic nominee suspending his Senate campaign, local Nazi Wade Marks expressed regret over getting his Graham Plat...
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids - Article image
Family · May 19, 2026 · 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids

OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
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Celebs · Jul 8, 2026 · 75
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Hamas Fighter Really Struggling With Resolution Not To Rape Anyone During Ramadan - Article image
World · Mar 12, 2024 · 101
Hamas Fighter Really Struggling With Resolution Not To Rape Anyone During Ramadan

GAZA - Mohammed Sinwar took time away from raping this week to celebrate Ramadan and confide in his fellow Gazans about the hardship of avoiding rape ...
'I'm Sorry, Dave—I'm Afraid I Can't Do That,' Intones Menacing Mark Zuckerberg As Man Attempts To Delete His Facebook Account - Article image
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Sunday is the best day of the week. The coffee tastes a little bit better when enjoyed with the people of the Lord. How was church for you yesterday? ...
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Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom - Article image
Premium · May 19, 2026 · 94
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom

As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492 - Article image
Premium · May 18, 2026 · 33
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