Politics
· Jul 9, 2026
· 45
Nazi Really Regretting Getting Graham Platner Tattoo
BANGOR, ME - In the wake of the Democratic nominee suspending his Senate campaign, local Nazi Wade Marks expressed regret over getting his Graham Plat...
Life
· Jul 9, 2026
· 42
Little League Team Excited For Chubby Kid’s Family To Bring The Snacks
MEDINA, OH - The excitement was palpable this afternoon on the bench of a local little league team after word spread that the chubby kid's family was ...
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Sports
· Jul 6, 2026
· 133
8 Simple, Foolproof Ways To Test An Athlete's Gender
On June 30, the United States Supreme Court upheld the right of states to ban transgender athletes from competing in female sports. Now, the hard work...
Sports
· Jul 7, 2026
· 54
U.S. Back In World Cup After Trump Deports Belgian Team
U.S. - The United States Men's National Team was officially placed back in the World Cup after President Donald Trump ordered the deportation of the e...
Politics
· Jul 7, 2026
· 59
Rape Allegations Mar Reputation Of Local Nazi
SULLIVAN, ME - A promising political career has been abruptly cut short after rape allegations have sadly marred the reputation of a local Nazi.
Family
· Jul 7, 2026
· 57
Wife Says She Will Be Ready To Go In 45 Minutes, Plus Stoppage Time
LIMERICK, PA - In preparation for their Friday date night, local wife Allison Murphy informed her husband that she would be ready to go to dinner in 4...
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Life
· Jul 5, 2022
· 333
Can You Spot All The Signs Of Racism In This Patriotic Picture?
Racism is everywhere - especially on July 4th! To be a good anti-racist, you must train yourself to see racism everywhere and then loudly and obnoxiou...
Politics
· Jul 6, 2026
· 73
Dems Wishing There Had Been Some Sort Of Sign That Platner Was A Bad Person
U.S. - In the wake of sexual assault allegations being leveled at Senate nominee Graham Platner, Democrats were left wishing there had been some sort ...
Family
· May 19, 2026
· 51
Study Reveals 90% Of Data Centers Just Storing Your Wife’s Pictures Of The Kids
OVERLAND PARK, KS - The need for the construction of massive data storage centers has been in the news again recently, with the results of a new study...
Politics
· Jul 7, 2026
· 66
Mitch McConnell's Staff Assures Public His Death Will Not Prevent Him From Finishing His Term
WASHINGTON, D.C. - As rumors continued to swirl throughout the nation's capital regarding his status, Senator Mitch McConnell's staff assured the publ...
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Premium
· Jun 15, 2026
· 68
How Was Church? June 15, 2026 Edition
Sunday is the best day of the week. The coffee tastes a little bit better when enjoyed with the people of the Lord. How was church for you yesterday? ...
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· May 25, 2026
· 39
It's Memorial Day: Whom Are You Honoring?
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· May 19, 2026
· 87
Farewell, Thomas Massie! Here Are 7 Of The Bee's Most Memorable Articles About Tom
As you may have heard, Thomas Massie has officially been defeated in Kentucky's GOP primary, heralding the end of his Congressional tenure. Massie has...
Premium
· May 18, 2026
· 33
Rejected Babylon Bee Photoshop #3492
Our crack team of certified fake news specialists work tirelessly every day to bring you fake news you can trust. We've shared before about how our te...
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