Weird But True: Two Christian High Schools Have Been Stuck In A Tied Football Game For Six Months After Both Teams Invoked Philippians 4:13
Sports · May 14, 2019 · BabylonBee.com

CAMERONSVILLE, IA - File this one away in the "weird but true" folder: in a tragic prayer misfire, two Christian high schools have been stuck in a tied football game for the past six months after both teams prayed Philippians 4:13 before the game.

The teams, the Highland Christian Knights and the Valley Christian Knights, are currently facing off in a record-breaking 25,920th overtime. They got stuck in the loop of neither team being able to win after both teams' coaches huddled them up to pray and both claimed the victory by invoking Philippians 4:13.

"Lord, we claim the promise that we can do all things through you," prayed Highland Christian Knight coach Bob Winsley before the championship game started in early December. "Like beat the pants off the Knights. Gooooo Knights! Now, everyone's hands in. Jesus on 3. 1, 2, 3, JESUS!"

"Lord, we come before you now and we just claim your promise that we can do all things through you," prayed Valley Christian Knight coach Bob Hartiker. "Like crush the Highland Christian Knights. Gooooo Knights! Now, everyone's hands in. Jesus on 3. 1, 2, 3, JESUS!"

Biblical scholars say that when two sports teams both claim the verse, it creates a paradoxical time vortex. "It's like an unstoppable object meeting an immovable wall," said one biblical scholar. "Some say they'll be playing forever."

At publishing time, the Highland Christian Knights had almost won after praying Jeremiah 29:11, but the Valley Christian Knights quickly countered with Isaiah 40:31, and the stalemate continued.


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