United Airlines Unveils New Environmentally Friendly Single-Engine Boeing 777
Tech · Feb 23, 2021 · BabylonBee.com

DENVER, CO - United Airlines announced the arrival of their new, environmentally friendly single-engine Boeing 777 at a press conference Tuesday. This comes after a successful test flight on Saturday at Denver International.

United said the new airliner, dubbed the "777 Eco," will be twice as energy efficient, due to having 50% fewer engines. In addition to lower carbon emissions, the plane will also provide a much quieter ride for passengers seated on the right side of the cabin.

"Turns out you really only need one engine to fly these puppies," said a United spokesperson. "After a short test flight around Denver and an exciting fireworks show, we are proud to announce the brand-new Boeing 777 Eco!"

The spokesperson claimed previous reports that a normal airliner had suffered engine damage were false. "There was no emergency-- this was all planned in advance," she noted. "We wanted to illustrate that the 777 Eco is symbolically blowing up the concept of twin-engine airliners and that we're sprinkling the city with the symbolic shrapnel of lower emissions!"

Officials said safety was a top priority when designing their new plane, and that the single-engine design shouldn't be of concern to passengers. "These jet engines are pretty safe," the spokesperson noted. "And with one less engine, that's one less thing that can blow up! Win-win!" 

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