MINNEAPOLIS, MN — Governor Tim Walz made a special appearance at U.S. Bank Stadium on Friday, marking his first appearance as head cheerleader for the Minnesota Vikings.
During the team's final preseason game, Walz strutted onto the field to show the world he had what it took to head up an NFL cheerleading squad.
"Come on, girls. Let's run a mean pick six!" he reportedly said as he pranced around with pom poms. "Let's show our Vikings we love them!"
With his term as governor ending in January, and his political career destroyed by the mountain of fraud he is accused of enabling in his state, Walz was forced to go back to the only world he's ever known: football. However, as he lacks athletic ability and no one trusts him to lead a team, he had to settle for spearheading the cheerleaders.
"We respect the governor and what he tried to do for our state, so we threw him a bone," said Vikings owner Zygi Wilf. "I didn't really expect him to take to the field with them, though. But hey, it's 2026, and I'm an open-minded guy."
Fans booed the balding senior citizen; disappointed that he couldn't kick as high as the other girls, though he did earn high marks for his twerking.
"I know this is Minnesota and I'm supposed to be progressive, but this is too much," said Vikings fan Tom Chris. "Maybe men and women really are different because whatever he's doing out there, it ain't dancing."
At publishing time, Walz had been honored by the community for breaking down barriers as the first 62-year-old NFL cheerleader.
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