Target Dodges Looting By Hanging JCPenney Sign
U.S. · Nov 24, 2021 · BabylonBee.com

SAN FRANCISCO, CA - In a genius move to deter looters, a local Target store has disguised itself as a JCPenney. 

"We got tired of getting completely ransacked every time something happened in the news, so we decided to do something about it," said Store Manager Andy Boreschnoz. "To our knowledge, no one has ever shown interest in looting anything from a JCPenney, so we put up this very convincing banner."

Executives from JCPenney disputed the claim, insisting that everyone loves their products. "Looters come from all around the world to loot our quality merchandise," said JCPenney's CEO Marc Rosen. "Please looters! Come check out our stuff! You'll love it, we promise! PLEASE!"

The local Target has announced plans to hang the banner up until looting season is over. Sources say that since the banner was installed, no looters have visited the store. Unfortunately, no shoppers have either.  


When guns are finally banned in the coming utopia, you may still need to defend yourself on the rare occasion.

Subscribe to our YouTube channel for more tactical instruction

Ready to join the conversation? Subscribe today.

Access comments and our fully-featured social platform.

Sign up Now

You must signup or login to view or post comments on this article.