Theology
Seventh-Day Adventist Orders Delicious Hot Fudge Saturdae

TACOMA, WA—Local Seventh-day Adventist Martin Lyle went to one of his favorite local restaurants Sunday afternoon and ordered himself a delicious hot fudge Saturday, sources at the diner confirmed.

Though most everyone else recognizes the dessert as being a Sundae, Lyle insists it is in fact called a Saturday.

“Yeah, get me one of those deluxe Saturdays with the fudge, a cherry on top—just hold the shellfish, pork, and any other ‘unclean’ meats you typically put on your Saturdays,” he told the bewildered waitress. “Just a good, old-fashioned, American Saturday.”

After a little back-and-forth, the waitress realized he was talking about a sundae. “Oh, you mean a sundae!” she said brightly, but Lyle shook his head vigorously, and insisted that although the dictionary clearly defined the frozen treat as a sundae, his tradition confirmed it as a Saturday.

After consuming the dish and returning home, Lyle fell into a nice long afternoon soul sleep, according to sources.

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