It is now Halloween season, so as parents you must be on alert for threats to your children. This year, make sure to carefully check your kids' candy before they eat it, being especially on the lookout for vaccination needles.
The COVID-19 vaccine has not been approved for children, but some deranged individuals may try to vaccinate kids anyway by hiding needles inside the candy. If your children receive candy from anyone wearing a mask - like the paper ones, not werewolf masks - or if they have a "Hate Has No Home Here" sign in their yard, you need to be very cautious of the candy they receive.
Signs of a vaccine would be a needle sticking out of a candy bar. Also, there could be a label on it, such as "Pfizer Edible." You may also find some Reese's Peanut Butter Cups in your children's candy; these aren't a threat, but take a few for yourself, because checking candy is hard work.
Authorities say to be particularly suspicious if your kids trick-or-treat in Dr. Fauci's neighborhood. He's attracting kids to his house by giving out full-sized candy bars, but you want to check those carefully.
In this instructional video, Chinese soldiers are trained how to shout the wrong pronouns at American forces: