Matt Chandler Hired To Wildly Wave Arms, Produce Massive Amounts Of Wind Power
Celebs · Jul 25, 2018 · BabylonBee.com

FLOWER MOUND, TX - Pastor and author Matt Chandler has been tapped by the state of Texas in order to provide much-needed wind power by standing atop a wind turbine pole and rapidly waving his arms about his person.

Chandler was given a post to work part-time several days a week at a newly constructed wind farm near Dallas. The pastor scales the tall structure, and after a brief warm-up begins whirling his arms in a rapid circular motion, as electric wires hooked up to his muscular system harness the immense amount of power he generates.

"I do a lot of sermon prep, book work, and administrative stuff all day, you tracking with me?" he told reporters, who acknowledged they were in fact tracking with him. "So making a little extra dough on the side while practicing my animated preaching gestures is a great way to get out of the office for a couple hours a day. And it's great to be able to give back to the community a little of the enormous amount of energy God gave me."

"Beats other jobs like flagging down aircraft or acting as a motor for a pirate ship or something," he added.

Chandler was asked to scale back his power generation after overloading the state's power system.


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