INDIANAPOLIS, IN - According to sources, local man John Kilgore knew the chatter around the water cooler was going to be all about last night's Super Bowl, so he did his best to prepare some talking points. The 33-year-old engineer, who has no interest in sports, didn't even know what channel the game was on. He spent the evening as he always does: reassembling his LEGO Millenium Falcon set. So he did a quick online search to get the facts straight.
His research paid off, as he was able to engage in Monday-morning quarterbacking with his co-workers, providing such gems as, "Boy, those Chieftains never had a chance against those Buckaroos, did they?", "I couldn't believe all of the end zones Gronkers was able to get!", and "Is that Tom Bundy the GOAT or what, fellas?"
When the conversation shifted to the Kansas City offense, a coworker commented that Patrick Mahomes never looked comfortable in the pocket, and thanks to Kilgore's newfound knowledge, he was able to confidently retort, "you got that right."
Despite not knowing a single thing about football or sports in general, Kilgore handled himself surprisingly well. With his newfound confidence, he invited the guys to his place to build Star Wars LEGOs.