U.S. — Texas Representative Jasmine Crockett is under fire for comments made during a banquet in Los Angeles where she referred to Texas Governor Greg Abbott as "that honkey boy in the wheelchair whose legs don't work no more." However, Crockett states that her words are being twisted, as she was only blasting GOP policies.
"I was only criticizing Republican tax policies when I called him 'Captain Wheelchair McCripple,'" Rep. Crockett clarified. "Besides, he likes the name. I mean, look at him. He has no legs."
While speaking at the event, Crockett also referred to Abbot as Governor Micro Machines, Speed Racer, and Professor Charles Xavier.
Governor Greg Abbott hit back at Crockett for the perceived slight. "Why someone would insult another human being at a Human Rights Campaign event, of all places, is beyond me," he said. "I am a human! Don't let the wheelchair confuse you."
Washington Democrats were quick to defend Crockett's words, arguing they should be taken as an allegory for how the GOP is crippling the American people. "She's black," said House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries. "It's impossible for her to insult a white paraplegic like Governor Furiosa."
At publishing time, Jasmine Crockett denied ever knowing "Optimus Roller Wheels."
Mission accomplished: Satan has just confirmed that Jesus of Nazareth was crucified and will never be coming back.
