TOKYO — The Prime Minister of Japan admitted today that sushi was a giant prank by the people of Japan to see if they could get people to actually eat raw fish.
"We got you good!" laughed Prime Minister Fumio Kishida. "It's been so hard keeping a straight face watching you dopes eat raw fish. This is the best prank in the history of pranks!"
The joke reportedly started in 1974, hatched by the Japanese Prime Minister's chef during a visit by President Gerald Ford. "Just for giggles, the chef put a piece of raw fish on Mr. Ford's plate and said it was Japanese tradition to eat it that way," said historian Emiko Nakaya. "To everyone's shock, Mr. Ford proceeded to take a huge bite of raw tuna! The Prime Minister had to leave the room, as he couldn't hide his laughter. Thus, sushi was born."
Ever since the prank's inception, Japanese chefs have taken delight in creating progressively more disgusting creations to see what people will eat. "It's insane. We can roll up raw fish in literal seaweed, but then call it a 'Dragon Roll' and people will eat it!" said chef Haruko Takao. "The other day, one of the other chefs dared me to put fish eggs on top of raw squid and call it 'Emperor's Delight'. A dozen people ate it! Oh man, I was gagging behind the counter just watching them."
The Japanese people also admitted that they came up with the idea of karaoke just to watch people make idiots of themselves.
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