Congratulations! You did it! By clicking on this link, you have officially proven that you're not gay! All those other people who didn't click the link are gay. And lame. HA! Sucks to be them!
But you're different, friend. You're heterosexual and based. You only click links of the opposite sex, which this is. Feel free to print out a copy of this article to show everyone how not gay you are.
Way to go! Today is the first day of the rest of your un-gay life.
Citing concerns about stiff competition from Amazon and an impossible-to-please Gen Z, Santa has announced he's hanging up the hat for good.
