SAN FRANCISCO, CA—Gavin Newsom is smelling victory after his blowout win in the California recall election.
In celebration of Gavin Newsom’s win, homeless people in San Francisco scrawled “Congratulations, Gavin!” in their own poop on the street. Some of the excrement was produced fresh for the message while most had been lying on the sidewalk unused for months.
Local sources say many people so far seem to be avoiding the area where the words were written. A few onlookers were critical of the message, calling it “disgusting,” “crappy,” and “corny.” But they were probably racist Larry Elder supporters.
The homeless population, however, was unequivocal in their support for the Governor. When asked what they love most about Newsom, every homeless person had the same answer. “Change,” they replied. Then they kept repeating it. “Change, please. Change?” It seems the homeless are big fans of all the change that has taken place under Newsom’s leadership.
Businesses fleeing the state, a rise in violent crime, and thousands of prisoners granted early release have all provided the homeless with a growing community of friends joining them under the bridges where they live. With a track record like that, who wouldn’t be begging for more change?
Scattered around the smeared poop, the streets of San Francisco were also littered with used hypodermic needles, presumably a result of California’s high vaccination rate thanks to Gavin Newsom.