Exclusive: We Have Obtained A Copy Of Joe Biden's Day Planner
Politics · Mar 18, 2021 · BabylonBee.com

Joe Biden's day planner was left on a table at a Washington DC Denny's this week. Before returning to the White House, our staff was able to take pictures of the contents of Biden's rigorous schedule. It is truly amazing that a man of Biden's age has enough vim and vigor to accomplish so much every day.

get a closer look at one week of Biden's activities here.

Here are just a few examples from Biden's dense schedule:

  • Muffins
  • Nap (many, many naps)
  • Crossword puzzle day
  • Do the green screen thingy
  • Napppppp
  • Also, sleep (which is different from naps)
  • Test new drones
  • note to self: Stop using the term "colored people" it's bad now
  • Cash that Xi money
  • Turkey (he was not sure if this was in reference to the country or the poultry)
  • Call Obama (recurring in planner. Keeps getting voicemail)
  • Tell Kamala to do the thing
  • Remember what the thing is
  • Detailed notes on who he can and cannot sniff at various events
  • Yell at cloud
  • Parsnips 
  • Tape Blue Bloods (starring Tom Selleck)
  • John Wayne-a-thon
  • Strategy meeting @ CNN


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