GRANDVIEW, MO — A patient's lingering questions were finally answered today, as a doctor pointed out on an MRI scan to the part of the man's brain where the Seinfeld bass riff has been playing for over two decades.
David Cathcart's unsettled feeling of not knowing where this unfading memory was coming from was at least somewhat calmed after he saw a specialist to pinpoint for him on the MRI results the specific location of the looped bass guitar riff.
"So that's where it's been this whole time," Cathcart said. "I've seriously been wondering how I've had the Seinfeld theme echoing in my mind for a solid 20 years. I guess watching every episode multiple times in reruns resulted in it being played on permanent repeat in my brain."
Cathcart's doctor was fascinated by the results. "The human brain is an astounding organ," said Dr. Curt Schampers. "As you can see here in this MRI scan, the Seinfeld bass guitar theme is firmly located in the auditory cortex. According to these results, David's brain has been replaying the theme on a 24-hour loop for over two decades. His brain is functioning as though his entire life was a Seinfeld episode."
Cathcart found a strange sense of relief from the news. "At least I know where it's coming from," he said. "My family and friends may not appreciate me humming along with the ‘doo doo-doo doo doot doot doot-doot doo doo' theme, but now I can explain it's not something I can control."
At publishing time, Cathcart told his wife about his MRI and yadda yadda yadda, she didn't seem all that impressed.
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