WASHINGTON, D.C. — In a surprise reversal from over 6 years of opposition, Democrats in Congress have officially endorsed Donald Trump for President in 2024 after he called for the suspension of the U.S. Constitution on TRUTH Social.
"Finally, a bold leader supports what we've been trying to do for decades," said Congresswoman Nancy Pelosi in a statement. "The Constitution has been blocking Democrat efforts to make the world a better place through suffocating government tyranny for a very long time. We heartily endorse this brave statesman for the next presidential election!"
"What a great guy!" she added.
Early polling indicates Trump now enjoys a 93% approval rating among Democrats and a 100% approval rating from "only-Trump" Republicans. Experts believe he is now a favorite to win his next 5 presidential elections, as long as he follows through on his promise of suspending the US Constitution.
At publishing time, Trump had fallen back out of favorability with Democrats after vowing to execute all journalists as his first act in office.
It's a serious medical emergency: you're minding your own business when you hear an opinion you slightly disagree with.