Health
Dangerous Anti-Science Extremists Hold Super-Spreader Event In D.C.

WASHINGTON, D.C.—The World Health Organization has issued a travel warning for anyone traveling to D.C. this week since according to several reports, a plane full of COVID infected anti-science extremists from Texas have flown to the nation's capital and are conducting deadly super-spreader events there.

"According to eyewitnesses, these Grandma-killing monsters didn't even wear masks on the plane," said WHO Director Bill Who. "It's absolutely frightening to think that there are still kooky science deniers like this still running around out there spreading COVID from their disgusting maskless mouths."

According to the Secret Service, several of these extremists attempted to literally murder Vice President Kamala Harris with COVID by meeting up with her and shaking hands while not wearing masks. 

"This is sociopathic," said local elderly D.C. resident Joe Biden. "It makes ya wonder what kind of misinformation these genocidal maniacs have been reading on the Facebook." 

Authorities say the extremists are still at large and should be considered extremely dangerous.

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