Cuomo Tries To Divert Attention From Sex Scandal By Reminding Everyone Of Nursing Home Scandal
Politics ยท Mar 2, 2021

ALBANY, NY - New York Governor Andrew Cuomo's political career is in freefall after new allegations of sexual misconduct from several women. In a desperate attempt to divert attention from the embarrassing sex scandal, Cuomo took to the airwaves today to remind everyone of the time he killed a bunch of seniors in nursing homes.

"Listen, people-- I know there are some accusations against me out there, but can we focus on the real issues?" said Cuomo to a roomful of reporters who had recently received a memo telling them it was time to stop protecting the governor.

"I mean, there's this whole thing with New York nursing homes! Wow! Looks pretty bad, huh? I guess some people died! Some of you should forget this whole #MeToo scandal thing and look into that!"

The media dismissed the nursing home scandal as "old news" and decided instead to dig up some more salacious strip poker stories.


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